Not pictures, but numbers

The race photos aren’t out until tomorrow (and you can bet your behind that mine will be truly dreadful so will probably never find its way to this site), but the official race times were in the paper this morning and I am relieved to report that I made it in under 100 minutes – JUST – thus qualifying to start in the Green group next year, which is less of a crush. My time was 99 minutes and 09 seconds, to be precise.

I should be feeling unalloyed delight, and I mostly am, but a small, mean-spirited part of me is disappointed that I didn’t do better. And when I say better, I mean better than some other people.

I knew two of the guys in the team would be much faster than me, they always were – even in training, right from the start. They’re younger, fitter and stronger than me and did it in 66 mins and 82 mins respectively. I am very proud of them.

But one of the girls in our team, and the girlfriend of one of the aforementioned speedy chaps, also beat me: their times were 92 mins and 98 mins. And while I’m proud of them, I’m also disappointed in myself. Which is ridiculous, I know – they’re each a good 6-7 years younger than me and both were running with their much fitter and faster boyfriends for the first half of the race, whereas I was running alone.

But still. Those are just excuses, really.

I know I could have pushed myself harder. I knew it while I was doing the race, too. Yet I didn’t. I am fundamentally lacking in whatever kind of grit it takes to make that extra effort to drive myself harder when instead I can just cruise.

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11 Responses to Not pictures, but numbers

  1. modestypress says:

    You are a champion at beating yourself up, anyway.

  2. azahar says:

    Beat me to it, modestypress.

    You don’t half put yourself down, do you, woo? Good grief woman, you not only finished the race but also made your time goal. Who gives a shit about “some other people”?

    Congratulations on a job well done!

  3. modestypress says:

    As the saying goes, azahar, “Great minds think alike; dull ones crawl in the same rut.”

    Although I plod on a treadmill, I can’t imagine running and completing a race as woo did.

  4. azahar says:

    I’d have turned off at the first frozen margarita stand…

  5. woo says:

    Mr Random – good point. I shall cease this senseless striving πŸ˜‰

    azahar – thank you. You’re right, I should be pleased with myself. Its hard though, isn’t it?

  6. woo says:

    Oh and having convinced myself that any photos of me doing the race would be un-postable, I am now disappointed that there are apparently NONE. Not a single one of the official photographers to whom I duly waved along the route managed to capture me, according to the website, and the video of me crossing the line was taken from the other side of the road, so I’m too far away to be properly recognisable. Ah well. Hubris and all that…

  7. azahar says:

    “Its hard though, isn’t it?”

    Not really. Just stop comparing yourself to others and feel pleased about your accomplishments based on their own merit. Putting yourself down serves absolutely no purpose whatsoever.

    And you gotta know that I wouldn’t be hanging around here if you were such a loser. πŸ˜‰

  8. modestypress says:

    You are an oxymoron in human form.

  9. What they said, in trumps. Our own inner critics can be so loud that we can’t even hear the approver in the background. Too bad about the pictures. I would have liked to have seen one.

  10. OmbudsBen says:

    T-woo, I ran for 30 years, only stopping when various joint ailments caught up to me. I wasn’t among the fastest, either, only running a 10k in under 40 minutes once, but back then I knew I was doing something to take care of myself.

    I’m past 50 now, and have some friends who haven’t looked out for their bodies as they might. It’s real easy with bodies: use it or lose it, and they have trouble now even with mundane stuff like 2 flights of stairs.

    After all the years of running I can still go up them fairly quick, and I’m sure those benefits are there for you, too. All of which comes by way of saying you did win, Trucie-woo. And you still are winning. Every time you go out for a run, you’re winning, in a way, and the long-term benefits will be there for you.

    All of which wouldn’t stop me from teasing you, were we in the same town, by leaning forward, one forearm out in the starter’s pose and asking, “wanna race?” πŸ˜‰

  11. woo says:

    Azahar – k, I will bear that in mind πŸ˜‰

    Mr Random – who are you calling an oxy?

    Healingmagichands – I think it’s partly a British thing; celebration and congratulation are just not part of our culture. Efforts must be made to overcome that and to ignore the inner critic at least sometimes!

    Ombudsben – lol, sure, once round the block! I think you’re right though about fitness levels when younger standing one in good stead later. I certainly intend to keep going with my yoga as long as I can!

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