This Is Not What I Was Going To Write

I was going to write a sincere and heartfelt post about the engagement party, birthday and wedding I attended this weekend. The wedding, especially, since it was a mindful and real ceremony where both participants – and their families – had clearly thought carefully about why they were getting married and what qualities they loved and respected in the other, and were able to articulate their thoughts and feelings clearly and without revolting sentimentality.

However, as it happens, I’m too exhausted. Three evenings of gallivanting in succession have wiped me out. Probably not helped by the previous week’s salmonella poisoning, I grant you.


And now I’ve just had to sit in a two hour meeting while three senior colleagues got into whatever the female equivalent of a pissing match is. It was like being the kid caught between parents passively-aggressively ‘discussing’ an issue and laying blame. But without the option of storming off to my room, slamming the door, and playing Radiohead at maximum volume until supper time.

This particular fight had to come and is, in fact, long overdue. Things need to change, absolutely. I just wish I wasn’t caught in the middle, with both sides trying to get me to agree with their opinion when all I really want to say is:

“Shut up, all of you. I disagree with the lot of you, jointly and severally, for numerous reasons – the main one being that what you are saying is RUBBISH. Complete and utter nonsensical twaddle. And also because you, Old Fashioned Editor Woman, are sly and back-stabbing and aggravating beyond bearing. You should just do what I say right from the start, save yourselves and me a great deal of time and energy, and then we could all get on with our jobs and stop having idiotic meetings where nothing gets decided.”

Oh, and the next person who tells me that we could get our illustrations more cheaply by using local artists [this, despite the current exchange rate with the pound and US dollar meaning that we’re actually getting a fantastic deal on our overseas commissions] is more than welcome to try doing my job. No, really, be my fucking guest.



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12 Responses to This Is Not What I Was Going To Write

  1. sledpress says:

    I have always been fairly sickened by how much time in the average workplace is taken up by people working out their issues from nursery school, versus any attempt to accomplish the task at hand.

  2. piereth says:

    SHIT, internecine rigmarole is enervating in the extreme. I feel for you. Thank you for sending me books!! 🙂 xxx

  3. doctordi says:

    If you weren’t talking about women, I’d swear these were my husband’s most recent meetings..

    The wedding sounds lovely – focus on that!!

    • Norwichrocks says:

      Yes, its odd – none of the three women are particularly ‘masculine’ usually in their approach to work, but they’re each having to make major adjustments to the hierarchy and working processes due to the reshuffle after our CEO retired. And they’re none of them coping with it particularly well so far.

      I had to intervene yesterday afternoon when our Design Assistant was given two different and contradictory sets of instructions for the same task by the two main protagonists, and request that they actually discuss and agree between themselves what they want to happen and only then give out instructions, so as to avoid confusion and wasted time (and money).

      But yes, the wedding was lovely. Which reminds me, I must send a thank you card today!

      • doctordi says:

        Good on you – that sort of push-me-pull-you confusion is just bloody inefficient!!! Hopefully being asked to clarify the brief jointly will encourage greater communication/cooperation between them. Boring having to arbitrate, boring and draining, but it sounds like you have the situation well in hand.

  4. Okay, and I realize that this is probably why I am self-employed and was fired from my last job, I just don’t understand why you don’t actually say: “Shut up, all of you. I disagree with the lot of you, jointly and severally, for numerous reasons – the main one being that what you are saying is RUBBISH. Complete and utter nonsensical twaddle. And also because you, Old Fashioned Editor Woman, are sly and back-stabbing and aggravating beyond bearing.” Okay, maybe not the last sentence.

    I vote for the wedding. Wasn’t there supposed to be a picture of a dress with a slit?

    • Norwichrocks says:

      hmmm, I have been very close to being fired on several occasions. Right now I can’t afford to be fired, so I have to honest without giving full vent to my frustrations. Its probably character-building.

      I’m afraid I was so overwhelmed by the wedding that i didn’t take photos, but I’ll see if I can get some of the ‘official’ ones to show you all the dresses and make up horrors!

  5. azahar says:

    Office politics was always the main reason I could never work in an office. I admire your ability to cope with all that.

    • Norwichrocks says:

      Well, I guess if complaining about it and grumping around counts as coping with it, then yes, I am coping with it 😉

  6. OmbudsBen says:

    Curious, I’ve just been through it with coworkers, too, including a backstabber whom I found out squealed months ago and my boss was so annoyed he didn’t bother to tell me what happened. (I was kind of touched by that, although it became a hassle for him.)

    Yes, I dream increasingly of a part-time job doing something else; it may be time soon to escape.

    There’s a wonderful Dilbert comic about meetings, where he bemoans people complaining about their “unrelated emotional issues.” Since then, I’ve noticed it more often — it’s amazing how much baggage people cart around, and how willing they are to put it on display.

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