Various things, you know how it is

1. I know there are more vital problems facing the world than running out of conditioner but, really, for about 2 minutes this morning I couldn’t think of any.

Today I will be wearing a blonde bird’s nest on my head.

2. Today is the elder of my two nieces’ 3rd birthday. Happy birthday Beatrice! And gosh, those two years have disappeared remarkably quickly. I fear I may not have sent my birthday present parcel early enough to reach her in time – it somehow always surprises me that it can take 10 days for a small box to get from here to there, when my mind can hop that distance and have me standing at the front door in no time at all.

3. In my continuing quest to ‘get over’ the man I have been unrequitedly in love with for several years, I have had to stop contacting him which means, among other things, that I thought I would no longer have someone with whom to exchange surprise gifts of books by post.

The completely wonderful Mr Random saved me from such a dire fate last week, however. And I cannot tell you how much I appreciate it.

4. I loathe parties*. Especially the kind where everyone stands up and drinks – if there is dancing I can usually bear it by simply retreating to the dance floor and grooving madly/badly until I can decently make an exit. However, we are now entering Silly Season and I have already received several invitations to Christmas parties being thrown by various photo agencies (because part of my job is to handle our picture spend) in a range of ultra cool bars in the city.

I have politely declined them all, which fills me with a sense of glee I can barely contain. Escaping a party is almost as good as being sent a surprise book in the post.

Last year, one of the bigger picture agencies held their Christmas party at Sydney Aquarium which was BRILLIANT. I didn’t really talk to anyone (except to thank my hosts, of course), but by god, I had a fantastic couple of hours communing in the dark with the sharks in the main ‘walk-through’ tank. The GFC has clearly put the kaibosh on such expensive hospitality frivolity this year, sadly.

* Dinner parties for up to 10 guests are excepted. Those I can deal with because a) you can usually hear yourself over the music and thus hold a decent conversation and b) there’s something to do. If you don’t drink and you don’t smoke, just standing around shouting into other people’s faces and trying to look cool gets tedious rather quickly.

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19 Responses to Various things, you know how it is

  1. modestypress says:

    1. I am sure it is the most delightful bird’s nest ever worn by fair babe.
    2. Not only that, I am completely amazed that I can communicate with said fair babe over my computer to a land where summer rules and I look out upon snow and feel many degrees below zero in either centigrade or the American we measure differently than the rest of the world degrees.
    3. Anything to have someone say nice things about me on the Internet. Especially as my wife and I (atheists, both) are going to see a female minister marriage counselor as our marriage of forty-five years has worn out like a bad knee or bad hip.
    Also, I am scraping my close to demented 66-year-old mind to think if I know of any other funny books worth shipping to Australia? Or should I quit whilst I am ahead. Well, you never know; if I live long enough another parcel may break through Australian customs. Maybe it will contain the urn containing my ashes. Which will be as boring as anyone else’s ashes.
    4. I think you should throw a β€œI hate parties, party.” With my ash-urn as centerpiece.
    The chooks’ water is frozen. I was supposed to thaw it several hours ago. I better change their water quickly or I will be in big trouble with the little woman who no longer can stand me.

    • Norwichrocks says:

      1. thank you πŸ™‚
      2. Summer certainly much in evidence here today, I’m delighted to report.
      3. Let’s hope she (the minister counselor) can focus on the relationship without invoking ‘Him Upstairs’ as I doubt that will help!
      4. That would be a very select party. I suspect I’d be the only guest.

      Never anger little chooks or little women. They have unsuspected ninja skills.

  2. sledpress says:

    I hate just about all parties too, though I make exceptions if there is truly good food and you can dress to kill.

    But even the annual office Christmas party that I have been a “guest” at for the past few years lacks anything as engaging as a tank of sharks. Just those animatronic illuminated deer composed of wire frames that nod their heads up and down and from side to side, which is really creepy when you’re not expecting them to do it.

    • Norwichrocks says:

      Apparently, I’m terrifying enough as it is, without dressing to kill. Which is all the more reason to do it, I agree πŸ˜‰

      Animatronic anything freak me WAY out. Avoid, avoid!

  3. Mr. Random is an amazing savior, isn’t he? I don’t know what I’d have done without him all these years. And I am not being ironic or sarcastic in the least.

    • Norwichrocks says:

      I concur wholeheartedly. I don’t think I can adequately convey just how timely and how welcome his intervention was. But just knowing that someone you’ve never met – are never even likely to meet – is thinking of you and wishing you well is a Very Good Thing Indeed.

  4. azahar says:

    I like the “I hate parties” party idea! πŸ™‚

    I can’t remember the last time I went to a party, but I’ve been going to quite a few events recently in which networking is the main objective and I find those very interesting. Maybe because they’re more honest and nobody is standing around wondering if they’re having fun yet…

    • Norwichrocks says:

      Yes, I can see the point of networking events from a professional point of view, but these parties tend to be so loud and so dark that you can’t really hold a conversation so networking is realistically out.

      Looks like we’ll have quite a crowd at our “I hate parties” party πŸ˜‰

  5. fugitivepeaces says:

    1. Gawd’s sake, girl, your work is full of them womenfolk. Someone’ll have an emergency leave-in conditioner stashed in their desk, next to the tampons and the nailfiles…
    2. We need one of those laser-transfer-thingummies your ex-boss liked the sound of. You know, like a hologram. For $15. By Friday, ‘kay?
    3. Go, Random acts of book-kindness!
    4. Nice save with the asterisked section πŸ˜‰

    • Norwichrocks says:

      1. Sadly, they’re all as useless as me when it comes to grooming products.
      2. Never was a Star Trek transporter beam more necessary. Shurely there *must* be a way to stick one on the front of a book…
      4. Absolutely. And your dinner parties are excepted even if they have more than 10 guests, because I know they’ll all be lovely and the food will be fantastic. And I can walk/waddle home.

      • modestypress says:

        Their used to be something called “tupperware parties” which were cynical marketing ploys to move plastic dishware. I don’t know what the Commonwealth equivalent for spreading not very common wealth was, but there must have been something.

        Now we are on a roll. Woo will host “I hate parties” parties and “all as useless as me when it come to grooming products” parties for the purpose of marketing and sharing ungrooming products at the end of which a bunch of animated birds nests will strut forward like bad dreams of bird of paradise birds in New Guinea.

  6. modestypress says:

    By the way, Trucie and David, I just sent you an email requesting a small favor. I mention this here because sometimes email gets sidetracked as spam. Please read and reply at your convenience.

  7. OmbudsBen says:

    I feel that way about the whole holiday fooforall. Before meeting my missus, I used to celebrate Dec 26th, as it meant it was over for a whole year. Not that I’m bah humbug; I don’t begrudge others. Just not my holiday, nor my excuse for consumerism.

    I hope you get through “the party season” in good shape!

    • Norwichrocks says:

      thanks! And I love Dec 26th, Boxing Day, I have a new tradition since moving here that I go scuba diving that day πŸ™‚ Rather than sitting cooped up at home in the UK, watching dire TV and avoiding relatives!

  8. I feel way out on a limb here because I just love parties. But I don’t think that what I experience as “parties” are anything at all what you are referring to. Our circle of friends gets together on a regular basis using almost any conceivable excuse so we can have a big potluck and talk and drink and take saunas and watch the bonfire. I am hosting a Winter Solstice Party and Bonfire on the night of the Solstice this year, which also happens to be within hours of a full lunar eclipse and a full moon. I’m sure we’ll have a wonderful time. Jim is already contemplating what our centerpiece will be. Possibly the cherries macerated in brandy made into dark chocolate truffles. Anyone of you who is in the area that evening are welcome to attend.

    • Norwichrocks says:

      Now, those kind of parties I can totally get into! Its the indoors ‘cocktail’ type party that I can’t abide. But anything outdoors with a bonfire and pretty much any type of fruit in dark chocolate, and I’m there!

  9. doctordi says:

    Every year that goes by knocks a few decibels off my maximum noise tolerance level, so I completely agree, darling, that there are certain soirees best avoided. The aquarium do sounds quite magical, though – what a lovely idea.

    (Also, you are doing very well not contacting you-know-who and should feel very pleased with yourself.)

  10. Norwichrocks says:

    Thanks, Di. Not easy, but necessary for my self-respect, sadly πŸ™‚

  11. piereth says:

    Yo, hairwoman! Hope the thatch has calmed somewhat!

    Your president is on its way but typically is slated to arrive on 6th Jan so if it gets there earlier – I’ll smile and kiss a pig!


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